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Safety
A place to be fully known
What it is: a place where they can be fully known — and still fully loved.
Do this: the next time your child comes to you with something hard, resist the urge to fix it. Ask one question. Just listen.
Identity
To know who they really are
What it is: knowing who they are — not just their strengths, but their foundation.
Do this: tell your child one specific thing you see in them this week. Not a compliment. A truth. "I see someone who doesn't give up."
Gratitude
To see what's already good
What it is: the ability to see what's already good — even when things are hard.
Do this: at dinner tonight, ask everyone: "What was one thing today that was actually good?" Include yourself.
Resilience
To know they can do hard things
What it is: knowing they can stand in hard things — not just survive them.
Do this: find one thing your child is currently avoiding because it feels hard. Be curious about it instead of frustrated by it.
Purpose
A life bigger than just them
What it is: living a life bigger than just themselves.
Do this: tell your child about one way they've already made a difference — to you, to someone else, to the world. Name it specifically.
